hold my heart gently (in your familiar hands)
by Cadaverlee
Summary: "It's a rare thing when Sinbad gets so sentimental, but he notices that being with Ja'far in these moments does something to him that he can't quite describe. It's different than when they were still young kids, adventuring the world in search of new things." or, the one where Sinbad more critically analyzes what it means to him to wake up with Ja'far in his arms [AO3 repost]


The air is hot and heavy between them. Sounds of skin slapping together at a rhythmic pace and gasping, moaning breaths the only things heard. The celebration in the courtyard below ignored in favor of indulging in the pleasures of the skin which so rarely gets a chance to be enjoyed in the months past. Ja'far's head is thrown back against the pillows, his arms locked around Sinbad and hands clutching for dear life, so tightly so that his nails are leaving red streaks in their wake. Sinbad has his hand under one of Ja'far's knees and he lifts it's a little higher to fit a little better and—

"_God_," Ja'far moans, body quaking with such suddenly intense pleasure. "There, Sin, right there— _fuck_— please!"

Sinbad's smirk is enough to make Ja'far moan out again, his golden eyes so intense and focused that Ja'far feels like he's being drowned and burned at the same time and it's _wonderful_. Sinbad holds Ja'far's leg under his knee just so and shifts into a brutal pace. He's leaning forward to lick and bite at the juncture between neck and shoulder while Ja'far is losing his mind below him, and honestly? He's nearly losing his own mind to the sound, the smell, the _feel_ of his most trusted advisor. His best friend. Dare he even say… his lover, at least in this moment.

Sinbad let's himself fully go when Ja'far reaches up to grab a handful of purple hair and _pulls_, rather ruthlessly. Were he in a clearer state of mind he'd damn Ja'far for knowing one of his biggest turn ons. But as it is, Sinbad just loses himself in the entirety that is Ja'far, who's a babbling, incoherent mess as of now and neither of them would have it any other way.

When Ja'far finally comes, his whole body is shuddering, toes curling, and Sinbad's name falling from his lips in a drawn-out moan. Sinbad doesn't last much longer, and he's murmuring Ja'far's own name like a prayer into his neck when he finally reaches his own orgasm. They're quiet for a few minutes, breathing together. Sinbad let's Ja'far's leg drop and he's running a soothing hand up and down his thigh while Ja'far is carding his fingers through what of Sinbad's hair he can easiest reach without moving too much.

They share soft kisses after shifting onto their sides, feather light touches against each other's skin, and quiet murmurs of affection. It's like this for a while, until Sinbad deems it quite necessary to clean them up lest Ja'far be cranky in the morning. And even though the process only takes minutes, Ja'far wraps himself like a starfish around Sinbad once finished, nuzzling into his neck and has now made up his mind to not move for, at the very least, several hours. Sinbad doesn't mind. He's wrapped up just as tightly around Ja'far, playing with his white hair in a manner he knows Ja'far likes.

"Feel better?" Sinbad asks quietly, the baritone of his voice rumbling enough through his chest that Ja'far can feel it. Like the thunder always accompanying Baal's lightning.

He makes a content sounding hum. "Much." And, after a few minutes, adds, "I must admit, Sinbad, I think I quite love you."

"Funny you should say that, because I was just thinking the same about you."

Ja'far hums again, Sinbad picking up the tonal change to mean contemplation. He says, "You can think about things the way you do tomorrow. Relax now."

"I am relaxed," Ja'far replies, stifling a yawn against Sinbad's skin. "I just… am very, very relaxed. And grateful. You always seem to know when I need this the most."

"Give me _some_ credit, Ja'far. I can be observant when I want to be."

"When you want to be."

Sinbad only sighs. But it's light, and they're both smiling. Ja'far can feel the calloused tips of Sinbad's fingers trailing against his spine, up and down, up and down. The motion is lulling him further to the point where he catches himself blinking heavy and ready to doze. He feels more that sees Sinbad reaching for the top sheet, pulling it over them.

"You should sleep, Ja'far. I'll be here when you wake."

And they both know it's true - because after nights like these, it's usually Sinbad to wake first in the morning, letting Ja'far sleep as long as he wants. So Ja'far takes Sinbad's advice and lets sleep pull him under, Sinbad following along soon after.

.

.

In the morning, the air is warm and carrying the ever present scent of the sea. Ja'far has his back against Sinbad's chest, his thick arms wrapped securely around Ja'far's slighter body. Their legs tangled together under the top sheet. Sinbad is awake but hasn't moved hardly any. He can hear the easy breaths of Ja'far in his arms, feel his heart beat slow from where they're connected at the chest level. He nuzzles softly into the crown of Ja'far's head and idly wonders if waking up with Ja'far like this every morning would be just as calm and lovely.

He quickly deduces that it would.

It's a rare thing when Sinbad gets so sentimental, but he notices that being with Ja'far in these moments does something to him that he can't quite describe. It's different than when they were still young kids, adventuring the world in search of new things. Back then was nothing but camaraderie and everyone was sharing sleeping quarters with each other. They were close even then, when they vowed themselves to each other and Sinbad had promised to give Ja'far a life he'd never known or otherwise would've had. But now it was different. That vow had gone beyond simpler terms of brotherhood to… this. Sharing intimate space, feelings, and words. Their relationship had evolved on a deeper level from everyone else, they'd learned each other inside and out - quite literally. Even if it wasn't all the time.

And Sinbad suddenly found himself wanting Ja'far like this every morning. To wake next to the person he… _loved_. He realized he craved Ja'far next to him in every sense of the meaning. Found he wanted his advisor more than any concubine or dancer. They couldn't ever give him what he really needed, what he hungered for. They couldn't ever understand him on a level that Ja'far did.

Sinbad is jarred from his thoughts at the light skimming of delicate fingers along his arm. He kisses the back of Ja'far's head with a smile.

"I can hear you thinking all the way over here," Ja'far says. And there it is again - even in his sleep, Ja'far knows Sinbad like the back of his hand.

"Mm, sorry to disturb you." He drops another few kisses on the back of Ja'far's head, nuzzling into his hair softly. Ja'far is contemplating his next words, Sinbad can feel it.

"You're awfully… calm this morning."

"Would you prefer me pounding you into the mattress again?"

Ja'far slaps an arm curled around his waist. "No-not… _no_." He flushes at the deep laugh Sinbad gives in response.

"Stop it, you. What I meant was, you're very handsy in the mornings. Always ready to touch and kiss the moment I'm awake. Or even before to see how far you can get before I _do_ wake. You're… very quiet today. Is everything alright?"

Sinbad loosens his arms to allow Ja'far to turn and look at him, green eyes seeing right through him like they're wont to do. He feels strangely vulnerable when Ja'far looks at him like this, but it only makes him squirm a little. He's also not one to hesitate when he's made up his mind about something.

Sinbad says, "I love you," and Ja'far only blinks and smiles.

"Sinbad, of course I-"

"No, Ja'far… _I love you_."

And then it's there, out in the open. He can't say it any other way. Sinbad only hopes Ja'far understands because he's certain he'll fail at words at this point. But, from the changing expressions, from confusion all the way to the dawning of an understanding, he's confident Ja'far is catching his drift.

And oh, Ja'far is. He sees his king's feelings bared and written all over his face. He knows Sinbad isn't joking, isn't using one of his usual tactics to keep Ja'far in his bed for a while longer. The gravity of it all is quite real.

"Oh, Sinbad," Ja'far says quietly. He's petting at his hair now, smoothing purple locks to give him something to do with at least one of his hands. He doesn't know what to say, which he can feel is more or less terrifying Sinbad from the way he's tensing. Ja'far's hand travels down along the skin of his arm and back up to his shoulder. Back and forth. He sighs, one that Sinbad knows is one of defeat — more or less. "You're so unfair."

"Don't misunderstand, Ja'far — I don't want this if you don't."

"No, no, heavens above. I _do_," Ja'far says quickly, eyes looking back up to Sinbad's from where they'd wandered. "It's so… complicated. It'll be so complicated. We have a kingdom to run, Sin."

"I know, Ja'far, I know. But… we've managed to make everything else work. I know you're not one for public announcements or displays… we can start like this."

"Like… like this?" Ja'far gestures to their position. Sinbad smiles, which eases some of the mounting tension in them both.

"Exactly like this," Sinbad says, leaning forward to kiss Ja'far gently. "Slowly. Waking up together every day. I _want_ this between us more than I want to _breathe_, Ja'far. And because of that, I don't want to move quicker than you're comfortable with."

"How thoughtful of you."

"I can be. But also, I've been thinking—"

"That's quite dangerous."

"Shush," Sinbad grumps, nipping at Ja'far's cheek. "I've been _thinking_ that I owe it to you to decide where we go with this and when. You're always putting the work in for me, so let me take care of you on this end."

Ja'far is awestruck for a good minute. And when he comes unfrozen from his shock, he smiles so warmly that it makes Sinbad smile, too.

"I can't believe how grown up you've become," Ja'far says. While teasing, Sinbad also knows the words to be genuinely heartfelt.

"I suppose I had to be someday. I think you're already having a good effect on me." They share a few warm kisses before Ja'far is speaking again.

"Mmm, glad I can always be of assistance. Speaking of which, we need to get out of bed. Its well past my usual start to the day and you have work to do as well."

Sinbad whines. "But Ja'far!"

"No buts. You're still king, and kings are still responsible for running their countries. Don't expect me to start coddling you now - in fact, you should expect me to be _harsher_," Ja'far says, tugging Sinbad's hair when he makes to lean in for another kiss. More like a distraction, really, but Ja'far had seen it coming a mile away. Sinbad whines again.

"You're so cruel, Ja'far." Sinbad is pouting now, and Ja'far is untangling himself from his king.

"Yes, I suppose I am," Ja'far says, picking his clothing up from the floor to dress. "But do remember that you wanted this."

"Yes… yes I did." Sinbad's agreement is a bit of a surprise to Ja'far, who is nearly finished dressing now. Sinbad huffs and sits up, swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.

"Very well. In the future, however, I may need something more _persuasive_ to get out of bed in a timely manner." Sinbad smirks up at Ja'far, who has rounded the bed to stand in front of his king.

"Maybe," Ja'far hums. "But don't expect me to spoil you, Sinbad. I'll sooner lock you in your office for a week than have you make us late every day." He leans down to give Sinbad one final kiss before departing to do his usual duties.

Sinbad grins and says, "Well, I suppose I wouldn't have it any other way."


End file.
